What If Trump Had a Big Smile?
All photos created by Murphy Bot based on EMToast’s questions.
What If Abe Lincoln and Morgan Freeman Switched?
All photos created by Murphy Bot based on EMToast’s questions.
What If Tom Cruise Was Green?
All photos created by Murphy Bot based on EMToast’s questions.
What If Trump Was a Turtle?
All photos created by Murphy Bot based on EMToast’s questions.
What If Bruce Campbell Were Bruce Lee?
All photos created by Murphy Bot based on EMToast’s questions.
What If Gandhi Was Rambo??
All photos created by Murphy Bot based on EMToast’s questions.
What If Bruce Willis Was in Home Alone?
All photos created by Murphy Bot based on EMToast's questions.
Who Is Chowder Supreme?
4dr14nqg / Pixabay “Ask the Doctor” where readers ask questions of the world renounced general practitioner Dr. Charles V. Fullerton.
The Veggie Lion Dreams of Fat Little Sheep
The lion mesmerizes its prey. It says, "Lay down and die," but the lion does not eat its prey. This…
Miniature Cockroaches: The Blood Parasites Infecting Our Local Area
By: steve lodefink Miniature cockroaches twenty times tinier than bedbugs have been discovered in our local area. Scientists report the…
Humanzee Memoir Published: Courts to Decide Who Can Profit from This Love Story
Oliver, the human-chipmanzee hybrid who died in 2012 was more intelligent than was previously thought. A recent memoir was purportedly…
Godzilla 2016 NEWS! Alternate 'Resurgence' Movie Poster Leaked
An alternate movie poster for the July 2016 movie Godzilla Resurgence has leaked. Check out the teaser trailer for the…
Taste Crystal Windex RIGHT NOW!
Right now we're all thirsty for something cleaner. Right now artificial feels so right. Right now we're gonna make it…
10 Strange Truths from the Private Journals of...Thomas Edison
WikiImages / Pixabay American Inventor, Thomas Edison, shared 7 strange truths about himself with EMToast (when we read his private…
Female Teddy Bear Gets 35 to Life in Plastic Bag Murder
TEDDY BEAR TOWN: A teddy bear female has been sentenced to 35 years to life in prison for the plastic-bag…
ART 101: Intro to Rabbit Poop Snowman E-course
This is EMToast University with Professor Miguel Q. Tadpool. Professor Tadpool, is 2015 "Chill Professor of the Year" for his…
What Is inside the Head of the Great Pumpkin? It's Stupid, Sweet, and Frightening
“The Oracle” where a select group is asked to answer unknown questions and to ask unanswerable questions. These are submitted…
My Battle Scarred Skeleton underneath Your Front Porch
One day you're going to find my battle scarred skeleton underneath your front porch.
I Was a Middle Aged Weresnack
I was bit by a Chips Ahoy. Now at every full moon, my bones turn to cookie crumbs and Kool-Aid…
Tasers Banned after Intestinal Explosion Burns Hot-Wings Champ during DUI Arrest
Deerface, Iowa -- Two officers and a college student remain in critical but stable condition after an arrest gone wrong.
Let Him Be the Robot's Child
A pregnant woman told her husband, “For the tenth one, I want to do a Jersey Devil thing but with…
All the Robots Are Wiping Now
All the Robots Are Wiping Now is due to be released soon in our Local Area bookstores. Please check the…
Robo-Coffin Makes Dying Alone Convenient
Robo-Coffin is the new product from Local Area Industries that eliminates the worry and stress about dying alone. No longer…
Local Authorities Warn of Serial Slapper
LOCAL AREA, USA. Authorities in our local area are warning residents to be on alert for a serial slapper. This…
Defense Mechanisms of the Reese Owl Bat
Does the Reese owl bat spray blood out of its mouth or hiss? No, this denizen of the North…
Are You My Father? 8 Ways to Turn Millennial Troubles Around
It finally happened. Another surprise from that bitch you broke up with more than 20 years ago. He shows up…
'Safety First Vigilante' Terrorizes Local Motorists
'A new danger on our local roads has been dubbed the "Safety First Vigilante" by those who've seen him. He…
GB Boy Color: The Backlit Gameboy Color Nintendo Never Produced
If you want to back into Gameboy games, don’t bother buying a used Nintendo Gameboy of any model. Those things…
Easter Egg Found in C64 Game After 30 Years
This is "Tattling with Tanya" Calumny the hallucinatory gossip columnist. Tanya is a proud Wernicke–Korsakoff syndrome survivor which gives her…
Why You'll Never Succeed at 6400mg Advil Overdose
This is “Ask the Doctor” where readers ask questions of the world renounced general practitioner Dr. Charles V. Fullerton. Dear…
Are UFOs Hiding in Front of the Sun Where We Can't See Them?
I asked 56 year old Remy who was browsing the Starwatcher scope if he thought the sun saucers were there.
Suicide Dogs Bring Release to Terminally Ill
Joellin G.H. adopted a suicide dog named Zeek from Helping Hands Suicide Dogs to help here disabled father in his…
Over 40 and Balding--You're Finished
This is “Ask the Doctor” where readers ask questions of the world renounced general practitioner Dr. Charles V. Fullerton. Dear…
Dear Dr. Even a Zombie Has More Energy than Me
This is “Ask the Doctor” where readers ask questions of the world renounced general practitioner Dr. Charles V. Fullerton. Dear…
Man Spends More Money on Toilet Paper Than His Electric Bill
This is “Off the Clock” with Anthony J. Booze. AJ Booze asks residents in our local area questions they rejected at…
Why Your Boyhood Pain Never Works out the Way You Plan
I'll never forget the event that lead to my eventual disappearance. I came home from my math tutor and found…
What Does Taylor Swift Do on Saturday? Screw Your Wig on Tight to Find Out
“The Oracle” where a select group is asked to answer unknown questions and to ask unanswerable questions. These are submitted…
Scientists Were Loving... Then Everything Mutated
"Snippets with Racter" quoted from our conversations with the artificial intelligence simulator Racter (authored by William Chamberlain and Thomas Etter;…
Tell Me Sincerely, Are You Living?
"Snippets with Racter" quoted from our conversations with the artificial intelligence simulator Racter (authored by William Chamberlain and Thomas Etter;…
Does the Doctor Hate Vanilla? The Answer Will Make Your Bones Rattle
“Ask the Doctor” where readers ask questions of the world renounced general practitioner Dr. Charles V. Fullerton. Dear Doctor Fullerton:…
I'll Never Look at Brains the Same Again
“The Oracle” where a select group is asked to answer unknown questions and to ask unanswerable questions. These are submitted…
They Asked If He Was Nunsk... Then It Got Real
"Snippets with Racter" quoted from our conversations with the artificial intelligence simulator Racter (authored by William Chamberlain and Thomas Etter;…
When You Find out Where Puppies Go When They Die... You Will Chuckle
“The Oracle” where a select group is asked to answer unknown questions and to ask unanswerable questions. These are submitted…
The Ugly Side of Becoming a Were-Cat
This is “Ask the Doctor” where readers ask questions of the world renounced general practitioner Dr. Charles V. Fullerton.Dear Dr.
Why Fritzy McGee Is One of the Great Minds of Our Generation
“The Oracle” where a select group is asked to answer unknown questions and to ask unanswerable questions. These are submitted…